[@ChrisWillx] How to Fix a Culture of Emasculated Men - Scott Galloway

Link: https://youtu.be/2nDyZH0-uz0

Short Summary

Scott Galloway and the host discuss the challenges facing young men today, including economic viability and the need for positive male role models. They critique the current societal narrative that often demonizes masculinity and advocate for a more balanced approach that acknowledges both the strengths and vulnerabilities of men, while also emphasizing the importance of kindness, intentionality, and contributing surplus value to society.

Key Quotes

Here are five quotes from the transcript that capture valuable insights or strong opinions:

1. "I think I'm good at being right. I'm not very good at being effective. And there's a difference." - This quote highlights the distinction between being correct and achieving tangible results, especially relevant in discussions about societal change and advocacy.

2. "And the reality is men need relationships more than women. And that if you look at the data around what happens when a young man when a young woman doesn't have the benefit of a romantic relationship, she often times pours that energy back into her friends and her professional life. Men often times, not all men, but a lot of men or more men pour that energy back into unproductive things." - Galloway points out the different ways men and women react to and cope with lack of romantic relationships and how this contributes to some of the problems men are facing.

3. "What it is in reality is that person is sparky with everybody," - This line is interesting in the context of relationships. It is a warning against attributing too much significance to the "spark" one feels during initial attraction.

4. "It's not about age. It's not about a religious ceremony. It's not about having a family. I think there's a lot of males in our society. They get older, but never become men. And that is objectively at what point are you adding more value than you're extracting?" - Here, Galloway defines manhood as reaching a point where one contributes more than they consume, offering a potentially controversial but thought-provoking perspective.

5. "The most productive households in history, the most secure, loving, productive households in history bring a mix of very distinct masculine and feminine energy." - Galloway offers the opinion that a blend of traditional masculine and feminine qualities fosters successful relationships.

Detailed Summary

Here's a detailed summary of the YouTube video transcript in bullet points, covering the key topics, arguments, and information:

I. Introduction and Framing of Men's Issues:

• Scott Galloway and the host are meeting in person in London for the first time to record a podcast.
• Discussion starts around the framing of men's struggles and how they are often acknowledged in the context of women's issues. Galloway expresses irritation with the need for a "land acknowledgement" of women's challenges before addressing male issues.
• Galloway argues for approaching men's issues as a societal problem, believing that solutions are more effectively achieved by focusing on the well-being of all young people.
• The host argues for true equality being the acceptance of just as much criticism as anybody else receives in regards to a certain topic, or a general acceptance of said topic without having to issue disclaimers beforehand.

II. Gender Bias and Societal Expectations:

• Galloway acknowledges a bias in favor of discussing women's achievements and struggles, which he attributes to historical advantages held by men.
• He points out the different reactions when discussing positive attributes traditionally associated with women versus those associated with men (e.g., better doctors vs. better entrepreneurs).
• He notes a gag reflex when discussing the problems facing young men, as it can be viewed as potentially leading to misogyny.
• He criticizes the conflation of coarseness and cruelty with masculinity, which has been adopted by some voices on the right who recognize issues facing young men.
• He argues that misandry exists, but it is understandable, given the historical context.
• Galloway contrasts this societal narrative with the dangers women express about dating, highlighting that data indicates young men are much more likely to harm themselves than their date.

III. Education and Affirmative Action:

• Discussion about Title IX and the shift from 60/40 male-to-female college enrollment to the reverse.
• Galloway highlights the potential need for affirmative action for men in education to address the growing gap in college enrollment and graduation rates.
• He notes that the current school system may be biased against boys, citing examples like less recess time in same-sex schools.
• He discusses the torture for more energetic boys when forced to sit still for long periods, performing tasks better suited to female learners.

IV. Economic Factors and Mating Opportunities:

• Galloway argues for a more progressive tax structure that reduces the tax burden on young people.
• He proposes flipping the tax rate so sweat is taxed at a lower rate than wealth.
• He believes a lack of mating opportunities is a significant problem for young men, as romantic partners and friendships provide important guardrails.
• He argues that men are less attractive when not economically viable. The woman in the show refers to the "Girl Problem", or in other words, "Socioeconomic inflation".
• They discuss how women tend to "date up" and across, making it difficult for less economically successful men to find partners.
• An imbalanced sex ratio due to women's selection preferences benefits ultra-high-performing men, leading to polygamy and a lack of commitment.
• The reality is men need relationships more than women. If men are alone, they tend to engage in unproductive activities, and are more prone to conspiracy theories or substance abuse.

V. Gender Roles and Expectations:

• The host pushes back against the archetype of the lonely, cat-loving woman in her 30s, arguing that being single is now often celebrated.
• They discuss "soft bigotry of male expectations," where certain male traits or career aspirations are not celebrated.
• The discussion then moves onto the misrepresentation of women in anthropology, or being able to do what men do just as well or even better. But what about what the men cannot do that the women can do? Is that lesser?
• The challenges of taking pride in being a homemaker, and the societal expectation that women should aspire to male-dominated roles.
• The discussion also touches on the shame associated with being a stay-at-home dad and the underlying assumption that the man could not make a living.
• They critique taking narratives (women stepping into the boardroom, for instance) too far.

VI. DEI and Affirmative Action Revisited:

• Discussion about overcorrection in Democratic policies and DEI programs.
• There is a growing sentiment that you cannot lean into your masculinity or femininity without insulting the non-binary community.
• They argue that recommending traditional masculine traits is seen as taking away from the non-binary community.
• Galloway argues that people often demonize the male stereotype. Unless it's a woman, where that demonization goes away.
• He feels that being able to have both masculine and feminine attributes is a wonderful combination and should be acknowledged.
• He criticizes the shift away from economic class as the basis for affirmative action towards a focus on race, sex, and orientation.

VII. Liberal and Progressive Stance:

• It appears that the left is not interested in addressing men's issues.
• Men are turning towards the right as a result, but don't feel heard, seen, or valued.
• The right recognizes the problem, but uses a "coarseness" and "cruelty" approach.
• The far-left considers the men to be the problem.

VIII. Advice for Supporting Men:

• "Men want to aim high without feeling insufficient if they fall short. Men want their suffering to be recognized and appreciated without being pandered to or patronized and made to feel weak. Men want to believe that they can be more without feeling like they're not already enough. Men want to be able to open up without being judged. Men want support without feeling broken. Men want to be loved for who they are, not for what they do."
• Men want to hear, "I know you can be more, but you are enough already. And even if you just stay where you are, I'll be right here next to you. You're going to be great, but you don't need to be great. And I'm with you no matter what."

IX. Fatherhood as a Model:

• Discussion about fatherhood as an expression of both support and motivation.
• The importance of male role models in boys' lives.

X. Male Vulnerability and Emotion:

• The fragility of the male mind and how boys are mentally and emotionally and neurologically much weaker. But also acknowledgement of the taboo around men speaking about their problems.
• The lack of men stepping up as male role models in the lives of young boys.

XI. Societal and Economic Programs:

• They discuss what contributes to men engaging with pornography rather than the real world.
• Advocacy for social and economic programs to lift up young people, particularly those under 40.
• Recognition of a tax system that disadvantages the young while benefiting the old.

XII. The Me Too Movement and Dating:

• A look at MeToo, or the hyperresponders of it, and the disproportional way it was absorbed by different types of men. It was meant to sterilize the toxic elements of male behavior.
• Also, a look at women complaining they want men to approach them more while also using the Tea app to warn women against doing just that.
• Galloway argues that the "Men don't approach me" narrative, despite being very hot is often a result of these things and not a general result of some kind of men's inability to not act.

XIII. Advice and Mentorship:

• Galloway advises young men to risk "no," to become comfortable with rejection, and to focus on approaching strangers and expressing interest.
• The importance of volunteer work. Church group. Riding class.
• He highlights the need for third spaces for people to gather and demonstrate excellence.
• They see that are slowly evolving a new species of asocial, asexual males where they're literally planning their own extinction.
• The women are getting more advice and validation with platforms such as TikTok or Reals. "One strike and you're out as a man." Men should be that great all the time and shouldn't make mistakes.
• Galloway advises to women on how they can make sure they are being too demanding of the relationship. "Second coffee". Give it a second chance if you are on the fence.
• Algorithms optimize for front-end and not the back end. Don't ignore what really matters in reality.

XIV. Masculinity and Manhood:

• Galloway talks about his upcoming book, "Notes on Being a Man," and the importance of a code or set of principles to guide young men.
• He defines three legs of the stool for masculinity: provider, protector, and procreator.
• Economic viability as a core aspect of being a provider.
• Protector - Using the male form to the advantage.
• Procreator - The ability to embrace the need to be horny and turn it into a skill such as asking a woman a lot of questions.

XV. Surplus Value:

• Galloway introduces Richard Reeves' concept of "surplus value," where men should strive to add more value than they extract from society.
• I think there's a lot of males in our society. They get older, but never become men. And that is objectively at what point are you adding more value than you're extracting.

XVI. Risk and Growth:

• Risk is important. Try to be in rooms you shouldn't be in.
• Surround yourself with men you should be more like. The most popular kids are high school are those that liked the most others.

XVII. Nice and Kind:

• Niceness is underrated.
• "They did a study on kids in high school who are the most popular. It's not the best looking. It's not the best athletes. It's the kids who like the most other people. the kid who says, "Bob, great job at the football game." and is comfortable saying that. Lisa, what a great outfit and congrats on killing it on the match.
• There's a very big difference between niceness and kindness. Planting trees the shade of which you won't live under. Holding doors open for people. Being patient. Small acts of kindness with no reciprocal expectation from other people.
• Algorithms can predict what you'll click on but not who you'll click with.

XVIII. Advice on Marriage:

• Always express affection and sexual interest.
• Put away the scorecard!
• Never let a woman be cold or hungry. Pashmina and Powerbars at all times.

XIX. Conclusion:

• The conversation concludes with details about Galloway's book.
• The episode is considered a success and they say their goodbyes.

This summary provides a comprehensive overview of the topics discussed in the video and the arguments presented by the two participants.