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[@ChrisWillx] The Performative Male Epidemic - Louise Perry & Mary Harrington

· 8 min read
[@ChrisWillx] Summarizer
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@ChrisWillx - "The Performative Male Epidemic - Louise Perry & Mary Harrington"

Link: https://youtu.be/w6PNOlTVFlM

Short Summary​

American adults are reportedly having less sex than ever before, even compared to during COVID, with only 37% engaging in weekly sex, a significant drop from 55% in 1990. This decline is attributed to a number of possibilities including the decline in long-term partnerships, increased smartphone usage, limbic capitalism, and societal shifts that have resulted in changing attitudes toward sex and relationships. Though Taylor Swift's tradife might have non zero impact in couples, it's unlikely to reverse the overall trend of lower birth rates.

Key Quotes​

Here are five quotes from the provided YouTube video transcript that offer valuable insights or present surprising arguments:

  1. "You could make the case, I'm going to be provocative here, that birth rate decline is not so much a problem as just nature taking its course...we are being selected against by our own uh by our own commercial infrastructure." This quote challenges conventional wisdom by suggesting that the birth rate decline might be a natural consequence of societal trends, rather than simply a problem to be solved.

  2. "...the logical end point of limbic capitalism... the the way people make money, the most profitable source of new innovation is hacking people's basic primitive drives and redirecting them from what they're actually healthily meant to do towards making making money for companies." The concept of "limbic capitalism" as a driver of societal issues, like declining birth rates and less sexual activity, is an intriguing and critical observation.

  3. "I do actually think it's right that there's a subset of the ir [I] right which is the equivalent of woke just predominantly for men… update versions of two political sides as mediated through the kind of interactions which are just normal on the internet... full of all kinds of perverse financial incentives and geared mostly towards u rage baiting." This quote draws a surprising parallel between the far-right and "woke" movements, suggesting they are both forms of online performance driven by outrage and distinct from grounded policy or community action.

  4. "What I think is happening there is that guys have they place so much pride and weight on if I can get jacked, women will find me attractive. That is a big uh poltergeist to kill. And if you do, you go, "Oh, [ __ ] Maybe I don't have as much control over my mate value by going to the gym as I thought." This statement highlights the potential disconnect between men's perception of attractiveness and women's actual preferences, suggesting that physical fitness may not be the universal determinant of attraction that some men believe it to be.

  5. "I do not concern myself with the opinions of people who misunderstand me." While simple, this quote encapsulates a healthy approach to navigating the often-toxic online environment, prioritizing self-understanding over chasing approval from those who misinterpret you.

Detailed Summary​

Okay, here's a detailed summary of the YouTube video transcript provided, in bullet points, covering the key topics, arguments, and information discussed:

I. Declining Sex and Relationship Trends:

  • Sex Recession: The video begins discussing a significant decline in sexual activity among Americans, down to 37% having sex weekly compared to 55% in 1990.
  • Relationship Agnostic: This decline isn't confined to unmarried individuals; even married couples are reportedly having less sex.
  • Marriage Rate Decline: The speakers suggest a correlation between lower marriage rates and less sex overall, as long-term partnerships typically involve more frequent sexual activity.
  • Casual Sex Paradox: There's a paradox of declining sex rates alongside a seemingly more permissive attitude towards casual sex. The argument is that casual sex may be happening, but infrequently, resulting in less overall sex.
  • Smartphones and Limibic Capitalism A guest talks about a theory that smartphones are causing people to forget to behave like normal human beings due to the constant captivation by phones.
  • Low Birth Rate Smartphones is also talked about in respect to birth rates, particularly in areas of the world where smartphone usage is more common.

II. Potential Explanations for Declining Sex and Birth Rates:

  • Technology and Distraction: Increased smartphone usage and digital absorption are presented as plausible factors, distracting from spontaneous intimacy.
  • Modernity and Affluence: These are presented as complex, correlated factors that play a role in the overall drop in birth rates.
  • Limbic Capitalism: This concept, coined by David Courtright, is discussed as the exploitation of primitive human drives for profit. Examples include junk food, pornography, and addictive social media that detract from healthy relationships and reproduction.
  • K-Pop and Role Models: The structure of the K-pop industry, with celibate and uncoupled idols, is suggested as potentially influencing a generation to de-prioritize relationships and children.
  • Mimetic Influence (Taylor Swift): The engagement and potential future motherhood of Taylor Swift are discussed as potentially having a (small) positive influence on coupling and birth rates, due to parasocial relationships and mimetic behavior. There is a link to mimicry and fertility by showing that if your sister has a baby, you are more likely to have one the year after.
  • Status Incentives: The example of a pastor in Georgia baptizing third children to boost birth rates illustrates the power of high-status figures to incentivize family formation.

III. Birth Rate Interventions:

  • Propaganda: Propaganda interventions are offered as potential solution, such as showing mothers and fathers in the media, or showing K-Pop stars having children.

IV. Digital Modesty and Family Privacy:

  • Need for Preserved Intimacy: The speakers emphasize the importance of intentionally preserving a space of intimacy in the digital age, protecting family life from being "strip mined" and commercialized.
  • Intention Online Posting: Discussion around being careful and considerate of posting family and relationships on the internet

V. "Performative Males" (Labubu Man) and Evolving Masculinity:

  • Definition: The "performative male" is described as an aesthetic – a guy with floppy hair, oversized jeans, tote bag, and matcha, seen as a less aggressive, potentially "sneaky" version of male feminism.
  • Criticism: The performative male is immediately castigated.
  • Sneaky Mating Strategy: Argument that it is a poorly hidden pliable male trying to attract females with their poor approach mating tactics.
  • Consumerism: The performative male adds consumerism.
  • Evolutionary Fitness?: A thought experiment is presented: could these "noodle armed" males actually be evolutionarily fitter in adapting to new social and economic environments?
  • Post-#MeToo Acceptability?: Is this a post-#MeToo acceptable male that does not come across as doineering or controlling to women?
  • New theory - That there is a revulsion at Lubu man from progressive women, and have taken interest in the appearance of more masculine immigrants.

VI. The HMBBO (Hunk with a Heart of Gold):

  • Definition: Characterized as beefy, placid, and politically ambiguous – a modern ideal.
  • Protection and Sweetness: Offers physical capabilities of protection while also being sweethearted.
  • Marrying "Down": The New York Times covers women who have marries "down" from an intellectual level, but up from a financial level.
  • Modern Day Taylor Swift Husband Archetype The HMBO has a good example of that.

VII. Men and Women Relations After Me-Too:

  • Aunties: Mentioned how women play the role of aunties in this conversation, which influences the relationship.
  • The effects on Pushed Men Bad actors continue to act badly, and the men who needed some help get too scared.
  • Cold Approach: Short window of time for men in order to make advances at women.
  • "HIMBOS" The modern interpretation of a himbo - are they desirable or are women just afraid of telling them their real feeling?
  • The end of Schlub Feminism The rise in social media presence has removed women who would previously be happy with a normal or below looking person in their life, and it has caused to strive for above what they could get.
  • The good enough body The discussion that human needs in terms of physique have to be around a certain level.

VIII. Hypergamy, Fame and Mating Dynamics:

  • Hypergamy for Apex individuals How can someone be hypergamous when they have the peak status.
  • Women can also dominate at High Levels High levels of fame and wealth are mentioned and it can be difficult to understand the level of scarcity and challenge to engage with these people.
  • Reputation There is potential for downfall, especially after Me-Too.

IX. Me Too and Incel Theory:

  • Good faith Women have a hard time approaching good faith, because some guys are really bad.
  • How Women used to Keep Before technological advances, the discussion to make sure that the male would not have bad intentions or not be trusted came from friends or close knit circles.

X. The shift Right

  • Are women going right? It is hard to say, because when they do they move fast.

XI. Importance of Male Kin:

  • Lost Mentorship: Loss of intergenerational networks and role models.
  • Men's Sheds Initiative: Emphasizing the importance of constructive offline environments where men can learn from older men.
  • Decline of Cousins: Because there is a low birth rate, it is harder to for connections with people.

XII. General themes

  • Social Media Bad It is too aggressive and it doesn't help relationship building.
  • Dating is Hard Building a healthy relationships is harder than ever before because of the modern world problems.